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标题: [原创]梦无解析 [打印本页]

作者: 入胜    时间: 2008-1-28 11:52
标题: [原创]梦无解析
<p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">他说这里曾经是一片大海,碧波万里,秋水共长天一色,一些地中海的海鸥来这过冬,就是现在你在太阳岛拉萨河边看到的那些白鸟,哦,我原来还以为是一种鸽子或是大雁之类的在河边抓鱼吃或是找水喝。我说你怎么知道你确定吗,他蹲在那里屁声滚滚,一边恩一边说书上写的。我说你全国导游考试过了吗,他说还不知道,得看下来的口试让他们爽不爽,我说? <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span></span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">其实花点钱也可以,就像小姐是不在乎爽不爽的,他们只……</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"> <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span></span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">等,你有钱吗?</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"> <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>我看了看他。我们来拉萨一年了,我在一家酒吧工作,每天吃免费食物,端盘子倒水,给炉子添添牛粪,冬天其实也没那么可怕。他当了两个月的黑导游,就是随便在北京中路或是江苏路偷偷记下个黑色电话号码,办证XXXX……两个月他赚了些钱,他说第一次带客人时,走在布达拉宫的石阶上希望背点昨天看的解说词,结果紧张的喘不过气来,所幸两个老头比他还喘,没追究什么,也不知道他被自己的口水呛住,让他等下讲,现在他们大脑缺氧神智不清,他看着他们,他扶着他们颤颤悠悠的往上走。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>他说现在他能迅速的找出几十个人里的领导、老大或是出资人,然后阿谀奉承嘘寒问暖。他会在第一次见客人献上哈达的时候叫他们低下头,并灿烂的笑着说:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">扎西德勒。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">然后在车上解释,低头是互相尊重的意思。他可以口若悬河对着一尊佛像把周围的人吸引过来半个小时后再让他们散开,我说这就是你功夫不到家了,你应该讲半个小时他们还在听得津津有味,撵都撵不走。他拍了下脑门,说,对,这是我的新目标了。我现在挺烦他的,好好一北方汉子说普通话怎么带四川口音,越是人多越是这样。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>他如愿拿到了导游证,他骂骂咧咧:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">地方证。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">我记得不久前他报不上名时说,求求各路菩萨,让我顺利报名,他报上名笔试考完了说,求求各路菩萨,保佑我顺利拿到地方证。菩萨很眷顾他,他拿到了。我很少见到他了,基本他没钱时我会看见他,一脸嬉笑说请我喝酒,最先醉倒,我来付帐。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>我在酒吧过得很舒服,可爱的刺玛,神经质的嘎雄,发型一天一换的索南本,他说他的发型是水的,我认为很像。我们围着牛粪炉子烤火,半个水壶盖住火焰,半束火焰窜来窜去。应该喝点什么,二锅头兑雪碧吧,掺起来倒半杯,狠狠砸下杯子,溢出来的白色泡沫瞬间将要消逝下去,刺玛喊着:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">快喝。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">我一饮而尽,的确不错。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>晚上我做了一个怪梦,我和他不停的奔跑,我也不知道后面有什么东西,只是他歇斯底里的让我快跑,脸上的肌肉拧成一条一条的,双眼凸出布满血丝。我们跑到了一个粪坑,他指着粪坑说:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">跳下去。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">这次我没有听他的,狐疑的看了看他,他说:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">屎吭侧壁有个洞,是暗道入口,我挖了二十年。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">我终于明白了他身上的臭味从何而来,其实他没有臭味的,我怎么会梦到这个细节。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>我给他打电话,说了这个梦,他说从弗洛伊德的《梦的解析》上来说,你这是性变态,希望和尸体媾和,而你把我想成尸体,我说去你妈的,他承认自己是胡编,一忘情好像自己还在当导游,编造一些中国只有他和他的客人知道的西藏鬼神故事,我头疼的很,那先这样吧,就把电话挂了。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>其实我们从小就是好朋友,他像是我的影子,我像是他的衣服,哦,不,是皮肤,我可以形容他身上哪个地方掉了一根汗毛我能找见那个毛孔,换作他可以把毛再按上去。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>我们窃笑着议论当初班上那个惊为天人的小女孩,她转学来的,老师让她自我介绍,她站在讲台上:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">大家好,我叫曾倩,我来自XX,我的这个眼睛有缺陷。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">说完,她头一低,左手捂着右眼,取下了眼球。现在我和他说,曾倩就像是大昭寺佛殿前的护法,我们崇敬而且深爱着她。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>那你娶了她!没问题呀,现在还真想她,不知道她结婚了没有。等等,我想起一个梦。有个疯子,好像是数学马老师,好像是生物拦老师,在曾倩的下体爬着,努力的把头朝里塞,当然没有进去,满头的血和白色的东西,他一边爬一边说:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">生命在里面,不在她的眼前。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">我很纳闷,努力的还原这个梦,生命来自于女人下体,起码人们目测是这样的,看不到无数精子撞击卵子的现象,生命怎么来的呢,妈的这得探询一下这个器物了。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">典型的钻牛角尖,只不过你钻错了地方!</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">他说。或者是我在那阶段听涅盘的《子宫内部》? <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>做为八岁学画的他,晚上回家开始画画,三天没来上课,他的父亲煽风点火,母亲端茶倒水,三天后他从卧室出来,满身的颜料,抱着画来找我,我一看《悲剧的诞生》,无数的人头攒集在一个烂掉的女性生殖器的周围,穴的中央是一具畸形的婴儿。他差点被他父亲打成那个婴儿,他的父亲自称是古典现实主义的最后举旗者。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>他揉着眼睛说他很悲伤,这感觉就是世界末日,他说在一个人的眼里世界完蛋了和真正的世界完蛋了是没有两样的。他给我讲他烦闷的缘由:一个干部递过来名片上面黑体字加粗放大写着</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">副科级</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">是一个;思考用什么方式走路,比如手臂摆动的位置,角度应该和相应鞋子的那个部位交合,双眼睁开和闭上不同的眼睛的位置、角度又不一样,退回去,轮番闭一只眼试一次,走过来,退回去,不停的试;还有人摆一个茶摊,学蒲松龄请人喝酸梅汤讲鬼怪故事,他要别人回答,生我之前谁是我,生我之后我是谁,结果每天有四个无赖坐着不走在茶摊上打麻将,每天目不转睛回答他的问题一次</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">生我之前没有我,生我之后在这喝你茶的是我</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">大喝一声,糊。年复一年,日复一日,他认为无赖提供的答案是目前最接近真理的答案,每天茶水伺候,叼烟继续作沉思状,好像烟雾缭绕之下的一坨大便忽然具有了野心般荒诞。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>梦境又来了。自己在布达拉宫底下熠熠生辉,我梦到我出生之前,白蛇作崇被人拦腰斩断,这时的背景又他妈的换作一条湍急的河流,中间有几块绿色大石头纹丝不动,白色水流绕道而行,还飘荡起漫漫的白雾和水汽,伸出手整个手都是湿的,皮肤,骨骼,血管,内脏,心脏,发白的中山装,发白的布鞋,发白的脸颊,堆砌而起。我如一个高空坠落的粉刷匠,原因是我在练习少林失传几百代的高深功夫,每天的作息时间早上六点到九点练习排水术,排水术的最高层次可以把双手合拢从中指间插进敌人的肚子里一直到自己的手腕处,然后再剖开,排水术的练习方法是找一个类似古代大堂夹手指的刑具,用尽全身的力气往两边绷,每天两个时辰</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">—</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">九点我开始练习游墙术,就是和壁虎一样仿佛黏在墙上嗖一下一窜几米,我用绳子吊着自己,十个手指甲缝鲜血淋漓,还搀杂着灰色的水泥和白色的墙灰,练功完毕,我编织情节捏造细节由头到尾解构穿插叙述,可是最后又整合不在一起,在梦里我出了一身汗,于是,我习武的地方快到中午时才能看见太阳,我十一点多的时候开始练习阳光手,几块砖叠起来最上面放支蜡烛,他扎起马步,刚开始是一厘米,用掌力打灭蜡烛,慢慢的增加,从一寸到一尺到一米到一丈,五脏碎裂,肝脑涂地,隔山打牛,你躺在床上一个月后都立不起来,要是立起来,渐渐的化成一摊肉粥。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>他站在我的面前,吐出一句诗: <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span></span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">你的眼屎变成了化石。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">表情凝重,肯定在想:人类被人捏造或是进化的过程已经被我尽收眼底,我要发出几声冷笑,扑哧哧……其实这家伙顶多看到了我睡觉流出的口水,我又没做春梦,没死命的叫某个有夫之妇的名字,没喊出什么关于隐私之类的玩意吧?我怎么开始怀疑,难道他真的听见了,我有点忐忑不安,擦了擦口水翻身起床。他再没有坏笑,呈出凝重的表情,从怀里掏出两张票说到:</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">我们去看演出。</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"> <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>那次是什么演出我倒有点模糊起来,五颜六色的人们在台上蹦达,音乐昏天暗地,动作匪夷所思,我要是去台上扭两下,也一定很美,或许有人说不……我们看表演津津有味,其中一个精彩的片断时,我回头瞅了瞅后面的观众。越高兴的时候或越难过的时候我就喜欢观察别人的表情,这是我的一个小毛病,比如婚礼或丧事他都说我心怀鬼胎。我看到一个老太婆端起一把狙击步枪,装子弹、上膛、瞄准、再瞄准、扣下扳机、放弃,动作重演一遍,不同的动作系列出现了,她从座位底下掏出一个黑色皮箱,开始组装一杆长枪,组装完毕,颤悠悠的端起来。眼前一份报纸:伴舞演员</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">躺在地上呈大字形</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">八个字,加黑放大,还有凶手照片,原来是个男的,假发套、假脸皮、裙子和金丝边眼镜…… <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>出现这样的结果好像只能证明,我又睡着了,梦里跟屁了一把好莱屋的十五分高潮模式。其实不是这样的,那个老太婆就在倒数第三排,我清醒的走了过去,蹲在她旁边的椅子下,低下头找了找没有皮箱,她意味深长的看了我一眼,带着蔑笑,假发套子移动了一下,露出一小块发青的头皮,她看着我的眼神,绝对不是老花眼或近视眼,她的两只眼睛都在镜片上方固定着白眼的姿势,这时一丝恐慌从她的眼睛掠过。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" align="left" style="margin:0cm 0cm 0pt;text-align:left;mso-layout-grid-align:none"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span></span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">“</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">妈的!</span><span style="font-size:10pt;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体"><font face="Times New Roman">”</font></span><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn">没有了下文。 <p></p></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:'times new roman';mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-ansi-language:zh-cn;mso-fareast-language:zh-cn;mso-bidi-language:ar-sa"><span style="mso-spacerun:yes"></span>我突然怀疑我就根本没有看过那场演出,没有见过一线白天的海鸥迎风展翅,更没有在酒吧打过工(肯定),甚至根本没有一个放弃美术当导游的朋友,可我好端端的在这坐着,敲着键盘,舌头逐渐变厚变大有一斤重的感觉,仿佛快要炸掉了,这又是怎么啦。</span>
[此帖子已经被作者于[lastedittime]1201790791[/lastedittime]编辑过]

作者: 亢蒙    时间: 2008-1-30 20:24
<p>有点散,情绪上的东西外露的太明显,影响了叙述。</p>
作者: 入胜    时间: 2008-1-31 22:39
<strong><font face="Verdana" color="#da2549">亢蒙</font></strong>真是一语中的啊!<strong><font face="Verdana" color="#da2549">为什么每次刚写完的时候喜欢,过几天或者晚上写的早上看见就恶心,想撕掉,发这都手心冒汗,这个现象真是讨厌!</font></strong>
作者: 酒童    时间: 2008-2-3 23:06
<div class="msgheader">QUOTE:</div><div class="msgborder"><b>以下是引用<i>入胜</i>在2008-01-31 22:39:01的发言:</b><br /><strong><font face="Verdana" color="#da2549">亢蒙</font></strong>真是一语中的啊!<strong><font face="Verdana" color="#da2549">为什么每次刚写完的时候喜欢,过几天或者晚上写的早上看见就恶心,想撕掉,发这都手心冒汗,这个现象真是讨厌!</font></strong></div><p></p><p>——我一点儿也不觉得。</p><p>但你得把亢蒙说的问题想一想,而后校正。</p><p>我们帖出来的目的是啥?学别人?是!</p><p>但,重要的是<font color="#ff3300">找准自我</font>。</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p>
[此帖子已经被作者于[lastedittime]1202051266[/lastedittime]编辑过]

作者: 子木    时间: 2008-2-3 23:37
学别人只能学个皮毛,最多出个四不像,提高自己才最主要。
作者: shep    时间: 2008-2-8 16:59
叙述还缺乏质感,看似游刃有余实则虚浮,这种散乱打破了叙述的最终效果。




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