笑话

李子园

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 6pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.5gd;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">中央二套《开心辞典》节目挺好看的。这次，在和场外一位观众对答中主持人王小丫“崩溃”了！长期国民安全意识的素质教育成果就在这一问一答中显示出来——</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：那这个吸尘器要送给我们场外的观众朋友来你来选择一位。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">选手：开始停！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><font size="3"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">王小丫：山东的</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">1387706XXXX</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">的这位朋友。我们现在要连线他送给他礼物。</font></span></font></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：喂！你好！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：喂！您好！这位观众贵姓啊？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：啊？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：你贵姓啊？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：你贵姓啊？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：噢！我姓王，免贵姓王。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：你干什么？有事么？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫（笑）：找您有好事啊，现在要送一个礼物给你。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：好事我是不是又中什么大奖了？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：我们是开心辞典，我是小丫。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">（沉默）山东某男：王小丫么？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：王小丫，没错。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：真的假的，你给我的吖电话干什么？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：真的！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：我听着怎么不大像呢？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫（笑）：这样让我们的选手给你说一句话好不好？因为她选中了你。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：是么？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">选手：你好，这位大叔你好！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：大叔？我才二十多叫我大叔！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：对不起，这位大叔您今年那个贵庚啊？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：二十五（全场爆笑）。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：不好意思，您声音比较成熟啊！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：你是王小丫么？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：我真的是！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：你怎么打我电话呢？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：你是我们的会员嘛，所以我们有礼物要送给你你知道要送给你什么礼物吗？我们要送给你一台家用吸尘器。</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：我不用交税吧？（全场爆笑）</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：好实际啊，这个按照国家规定啊，该上的税还是要上的啊！</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：你不是骗钱的吧？（全场爆笑）</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><font size="3"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">王小丫：这位</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">25</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">岁的大叔啊，你很年轻是不是遭遇过很多骗子啊，警惕性很高！</font></span></font></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：我听着现场有观众是吧？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><font size="3"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">王小丫：来来，我们现场的观众给他，我们一起齐声说一个开心辞典好不好，来</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">1</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">，</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">2</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">，</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">3 </span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">……</font></span></font></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><font size="3"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">观众：开</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">——</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">心</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">——</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">辞</font></span><span style="color:#333399;font-family:'comic sans ms'">——</span><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体">典！</font></span></font></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">王小丫：相信了吧？</font></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0cm 6pt 0pt;text-indent:24pt;line-height:10pt;mso-para-margin-top:0cm;mso-para-margin-right:.5gd;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-para-margin-left:.5gd"><span lang="ZH-CN" style="color:#333399"><font face="宋体" size="3">山东某男：还组团儿忽悠我啊！挂了，我还有事呢，没空陪你玩！（全场爆笑）</font></span><p></p></p><p></p><p></p>